Volume 40,   Issue 7                                  July 2005


TV You Simply Must See

What the Glass Industry Might be Like on Television
by Max Perilstein

On those very rare occasions that I find myself at home, I do enjoy watching some of what the TV networks have to offer. So, it dawned on me during this latest stretch at home that our industry could easily be adapted into many of the plotlines of my favorite TV shows. My mind started to race, and, as anyone who knows me can attest, when my mind actually races, look out. So here goes, if the glass and glazing industry invaded TV land …

“Desperate Manufacturers”
Sundays at 9 p.m.

See PPG, Pilkington, Visteon, Guardian and AFG all living on the same street known as Hysteria Lane. The dish among the neighbors this week is surcharge and what it really means. We follow the mystery as diesel surcharges come and go, energy surcharges get reduced in the face of amazing rising costs and, finally, a traditional price increase—as rare as a non-dysfunctional family in primetime—finally comes out. Ah, but the increase is so minimal chances of it sticking are the same as one of the wives on that other “desperate” show being faithful to her husband. Catch this fun, frivolity and more each week on “Desperate Manufacturers.” 

Mondays at 9 p.m. 

Jack Bauer and crew have 24 hours to try and figure out why a fabricator would sell to his customer’s customer. Yes, an amazing occurrence is happening as some companies are actually going around their customer base and selling direct! This is worse than nuclear war or some virus. Can Jack stop the perpetrator in time? Even better, will the customers affected remember that one of their suppliers is actually competing with them at the time of order? Stay tuned because it’s gonna be a bumpy ride as Jack goes all the way to solve this problem, all without eating or going to the bathroom.

“The Amazing Race” 
Tuesdays at 10 p.m.

Manufacturers, fabricators and glaziers go all over the world to try and figure out the ultimate clue: What in the world is the NFRC trying to do with its “Non-Residential Rating Program?” The NFRC, which has meetings in Hawaii, Quebec, New Mexico, South Dakota, Oregon and Alaska, is a tough one to pin down, but these fierce and hungry competitors will not give up. They will chase these guys to the end of the earth so that their industry does not win the booby prize: a hard to figure, very expensive and unnecessary policing program. 

Wednesday’s at 10 p.m.

What happens when a plane full of architects crashes on a deserted island? These tremendous people battle to stave off the environment, they send out smoke signals for help, education and direction. However, when a boat of fabricators and glaziers comes ashore, the survivors of the wreck disappear, unfortunately, too busy to spend time with these glass and aluminum folks. They do, however, ask them to leave their information with the receptionist at the foot of the island.

“Low-E and Order” 
Thursdays at 8 p.m.
Which low-E do you use? Each week our intrepid detectives help you navigate through the numerous low-E flavors. Which one gives off a purple-ish haze? Which one is easy to temper in large sizes? You’ll find out here on television’s top-rated show featuring low-E glass! Don’t know the difference between VE, SN, SB or Ti? We’ll break it down for you.

“The Real World” 
Check Local Listings

This is the true story of when the primary manufacturers, other fabricators, NFRC, architects and Max Perilstein get picked to live together in a house after he writes a too- cute column. They will have their lives taped and find out what happens when people stop being polite and start getting real. The Real World.

I think I may skip on that last one. Yikes! Don’t think I’d last real long in that house. 

Heck, I hope to be around to see this article printed after some of the adventures I have myself into industry-wise right now unfold. Anyway, too many people say our industry is not glamorous; that we are boring. I obviously don’t think so. Whatever your flavor or fight, there’s still plenty to go around in our wonderful little industry. 

Max Perilstein serves as vice president of marketing for Arch Aluminum and Glass. His column appears bimonthly.

© Copyright 2005 Key Communications Inc. All rights reserved. No reproduction of any type without expressed written permission.